j-a

Life can be so miserable… Time and time again I wonder the significance of life. What does it mean to live? And die? Do we die to live or vice versa?

God must really have a great sense of humor. It’s rather amazing that He allows us to chase our own tail until we’re all dizzy and disoriented. And they say: "That’s life." Yeah right. Yet, what are we really chasing after? Does one live for something or dies for it? Most, I’d guess, would say they’d rather for God. Then, I ask, how can one know what and why one’s dying for if one has not live its purpose and meaning? And there are still others, amazingly, who boast to others and claim to live when they’re actually running away (and even dying). Why the pretense? Why the self-affliction?

I have always been confused. The Bible teaches us Christians to live as the salt and light of the world, yet it also tells us to first die to ourselves and follow Christ. What does it even mean to die to ourselves? Surely it doesn’t just mean abandoning out old ways and sins, giving up all our earthly possessions and letting go all bonds to people! What does it mean to live and die? God help me!!

I believe that a lot of us feel, in one way or other, that those around us have either too much or too little to say about us. And they say friends do not judge. Right… Funny thing is that when you need them most, you do either one outta two things: seek them and go on a pity-party, or run away to gain attention. But really, when you think about it, what are true friends when you really need one? Those ‘friends’ who say, "We’ll be here, but he/she has to deal with (whatever the issue) the way he or she knows best. We’ll be here…" - Do you call them friends? What good is presense when there’s no action in one’s presence? Surely you would do something if you’re there if you see a stranger who’s about to jump off a building (that is if you really have a passion for people)! All the more if that person is your friend and a fellow human being! Let us say that everyone that’s looking up at a friend who’s about to commit suicide, are all close friends. There shouldn’t be any form of diffusion of responsibility! Oh, right… I forgot… this is an exception: It’s suicide - a serious case. Must get involved. Bullshit, I say! Serious or not, one should still do something about their presence if one truely claims to be a friend to a nobody!!

Pathetic world… What good can come out from the evil of this world? Darkness shadows itself over the earth… nothing can run away from it… Light is seemingly so far away… Eternal Death may be far from us, and yet we experience death everyday, living in nothing but insubstantialities and emptiness; we may ‘live’, yet the eternal light of true life is so far from our grasp. All these: thanks to the education system that is still training kids to be ever more so skeptical and cyinical. Pathetic world…